Just Asking with Peter Banzon
Have you heard of the statement” It’s a claim that a mother is of more value or importance than a spouse. It is a statement I disagree with but it raises an important question. Is it possible to side with my spouse without dishonoring my mother? How?
Many conflicts arise when there is a misunderstanding concerning the roles that a mother and your spouse plays in your life.
When you were a single person, you were subject to your mother and submitted to her because you honor her as God commands children to honor their father and mother (Exodus 20:12). But when you got married, a change of relationship took place. You and your spouse became one flesh. Your spouse become a very important part of your life.
The saying “ang asawa pwedeng palitan pero ang nanay hindi” runs contrary to God’s principles. Both your mother and your spouse hindi pwede palitan. The Bible says concerning your spouse “What
God has joined together let no one separate.” (Matthew 19:6)
Though you are still commanded to honor your mother, you are not subject to her anymore. You have started your own family and are subject to your husband as head of the home (Ephesians 6:22).
When there is a conflict between your mother and your spouse you need to examine the cause of the conflict and see where the problem lies. If your mother is at fault, you must lovingly point this out to her. If your husband is at fault in the issue, point this out to him as well.
When you take your spouse’s side because he is right, this does not mean you dishonor your mother. By standing on issues and not personalities, you do not set one against another, rather you are laying a sound principle for resolving conflicts.
