I grew up in Dumaguete City, Negros Oriental without experiencing the love of a father. My father left my mother when I was very young. I was the eldest and we were very poor. I started to work to support my five siblings when I was only 8 years old. I engaged in different kinds of money-making schemes, both legal and illegal, so I was on the PNP’s wanted list for stealing.
When I met the Lord at the age of 17 in Pagadian City, Mindanao, the pastor who took care of me in Bohol sent me to study at Bible School. I was so passionate in the ministry that in my third year I was able to plant a church in Sibonga, Cebu City. In 1983, I married a beautiful and faithful woman of God, Mrs. Esmeralda Mascardo.
A new challenge in my life arose when my second son was born. He caused us headaches from the time he was born, through his wedding and on into the raising of his own children.
Once we even asked the Lord why He gave this son to us. I saw myself magnified in him. I wanted to quit the ministry because whenever I preached in the community and in villages, people asked me, “Pastor, why doesn’t your son believe you and do what you teach?” I could not say anything.
One day, I attended a seminar on INNER HEALING. I was fascinated by the testimonies of the speakers who had bad experiences in their childhood. While listening to them, I was prompted deep inside my spirit to talk personally to my son who, at that time, was 25 years old. I knew I had to ask for forgiveness for everything that I had done to him that had made him angry with me and that he could not forget. Right after the seminar I went home. I knelt before him, hugged him, and told him that I loved him. I was shocked when he suddenly burst into tears.
He cried aloud and trembled, telling me the particulars of how unfair I was as a father, how violent I am when I get angry, how unloving and uncaring I was. He said, “I do not understand why people believe in you when I myself find it difficult to trust you. I even forced myself to understand you though it is not easy. I would have killed you, if you were not truly my father ”.
When he said those words, I cried and embraced him. I assured him of a new kind of father-son relationship. After talking to him, I asked the other seven children what they thought of me. They also cried and shared the same complaints.
I realized then that the saying “YOU CAN’T GIVE IF YOU DON’T HAVE” is true. I was reminded of my childhood experiences. How could I love, take care and understand my children if I had not experienced a father’s love?
I thank God that we have a True and Everlasting Father who loves us unconditionally. I prayed that God would fill me with fatherly love and teach me how to love and raise my children . Yes, indeed He graciously taught me.
First, He changed me on the inside. Only after that did I understand what it means to be a father. He is willing to teach you as well. Nothing is too hard for Him.
Now, all my children are happy and joyful serving the Lord. My eldest son, Faulkner, serves as Founding and Senior Pastor of Cornerstone Believers Church (A/G), Dumaguete City. The so-called black sheep, Joash, is my partner in most of my ministries in Bohol, supporting me with everything he has. Our third son, BJ, pastors and administrates our Bible School. The other five children are preparing themselves for the ministry.
Our Heavenly Father does not only graciously forgive, but He surely generously makes ways to build every home.
